


The Lovers That Went Wrong

by icedcoffeebro



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, M/M, Polyamory, Spoilers for season 17, Trans Mike Dodds, Trans!Mike Dodds, angst with a hint of fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-14
Updated: 2019-02-14
Packaged: 2019-10-28 06:06:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17781998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedcoffeebro/pseuds/icedcoffeebro
Summary: Michael Dodds was dead, and that was it. Rafael was punishing himself; there was no trial he could win to bring him back, and even if Gary Munson, his killer, got justice, it wouldn’t change anything. The bravest cop the squad had ever known was dead, but it wasn’t just about that for Barba and Carisi, to them he was a lot more than that; he was their partner.





	The Lovers That Went Wrong

**Author's Note:**

> Omg this is my first time publishing a fic and of course it's sad, The format is present ->past and it switches every time there's a section break . Uh my twitter is @adarafabarba. Please don't be mean in comments I'll literally cry. Also Trans!Mike Dodds is a headcanon of mine that means a lot it's not just a random thing.

There wasn’t a lot left to say. 

Michael Dodds was dead, and that was it. Rafael was punishing himself; there was no trial he could win to bring him back, and even if Gary Munson, his killer, got justice, it wouldn’t change anything. The bravest cop the squad had ever known was dead, but it wasn’t just about that for Barba and Carisi, to them he was a lot more than that; he was their partner.

### 

Sonny and Barba had been seeing each other exclusively for three months, but it really seemed like longer; they had already met each others’ families and Carisi was ready to say ‘I love you’ to the counselor. But then Sergeant Mike Dodds arrived to the 16th Precinct. Carisi felt his palms sweating whenever he addressed him, and he’d find himself having sexual dreams about him while in bed next to his boyfriend. He felt awful, but he knew he had to tell Barba about it. That conversation could turn ugly really fast; even if he didn’t say anything about it, Carisi could see how Barba stared at men and women who would check Sonny out, and he could tell, thanks to his detective abilities, that he wanted to slap them for even thinking about his man in such a way. During their lunch at a cafe located between Barba’s office and the precinct, Sonny was gathering strength to confess to Rafa how he felt about his co-worker. He was prepared for the worst. What he didn’t expect was for Rafa to smirk and tell him to invite Dodds Jr. to dinner with them, so they could offer him to join them in the bedroom.

### 

The memorial service would begin in an hour, and Sonny wouldn’t stop crying. Barba held him in his arms. Sonny was supposed to be a pallbearer for the service, but he had barely even eaten or gotten sunlight the past couple of days, so Barba was scared he’d pass out. Nonetheless, Carisi insisted. After all, how would he deny the opportunity to carry his lover’s weight over his shoulder one last time?

### 

Sonny wouldn’t stop fidgeting under the tablecloth. He had disclosed to Mini Dodds that the dinner would be with him and Rafa, yet he still felt as if he was tricking him into something he didn’t consent to, even when he knew this wasn’t the case. His boyfriend held his hand under the table, rubbing circles on his palm with his thumb, whispering close to him that he was okay with the situation, that he fancied the Sarge too, and that the worst that could happen was that Mike said no, and even then, they’d still have each other. 

When Dodds finally arrived, Sonny clumsily introduced him to Rafael as if they had never met, somehow managing to call him ‘my boyfriend, a counselor, and the ADA for SVU’ all in the same sentence. Dodds reassures Carisi that he, in fact, had previously met the lawyer. 

Through the night, Barba led most of the conversation, Sonny smiling and laughing, and Mike looking pretty comfortable himself. As the night worn on, it dawned on both, Sonny and Rafa, that it was time to lay the proposal for Mike on the table. Sonny took the initiative and said it, but regretted it as soon as the words were coming out of his mouth. Only then did he consider how awkward things at the office would be if Mike found the idea weird. The Sarge stared at the two men, then nodded and told them he found them both attractive and and inquired if they were aware he was transgender. They weren’t, but they told him they were okay with it, and so the three men went to Rafa’s apartment together, starting a relationship.

### 

At the bar after Mike had been buried, Chief Dodds asked Barba if he could talk to him. Rafael found it odd, as the two men weren’t fond of each other, but given the circumstances, he agreed. 

Dodds Sr. asked the counselor if there was any chance to add a hate crime charge to Gary Munson, since, after all, he killed a trans man. Barba asked him if there was any way of proving Munson knew Mike was trans. The Chief admitted that, since Mike wasn’t exactly open about his gender, there wasn’t. Munson couldn’t have known. Barba nodded, looked at the ceiling, and sighed. Then the tears started coming. He had kept his composure for Sonny’s sake, but he had been his partner as well. He sobbed and threw the strongest curses he could think of in Spanish. Dodds Sr. held him while he sobbed loudly. He found it weird that the father of the deceased would console him, but after all, they both loved Mike.

### 

Rafa and Sonny were unpacking their things after moving into Mike’s place. They had been happily together for 8 months, and they were sure they were ready to move their relationship forward. Mike had the best place out of the three of them, so it was an easy choice. Mike was at the bedroom, changing his Queen mattress to a California King, as the three of them could hardly fit in any bed with Carisi’s and Dodd’s heights (Barba would always find himself between their tangled up legs). They genuinely felt happy, and Dodds was ecstatic about his transferral from SVU to Terrorism the next day. He disliked people assuming he was where he was because of his dad. Sonny and Barba would miss him, but it was hard to dwell on it when they saw the smile on his face. After all, they lived together now, and there was nothing that could tear them apart.

### 

Olivia approached the corner of the bar in which Carisi and Barba were cuddled up, clinging to each other as if their lives depended on it (which might as well had been the case, with the death threats haunting Barba and their third lover down in the ground). She told Carisi he should say a few words, that they’d mean a lot to everyone present. Barba rubbed his boyfriend’s back, Sonny took a deep breath, squeezed Rafa’s hand, and took the stage “Mike Dodds was the bravest cop I ever knew, and the sweetest lover…”


End file.
